Here's my tarot reading from last week.
​
Left to Right:
Past, Present, Future

Can someone tell me what they mean?

Noone said I would have a lot to say.
I don't have much at all to say.
Except, hey.
​Hey.

This is Lou and Aubrey. Here's photo from an upcoming series! Stay tuned! I should be done editing the photos by next week. :) <3

Bobby <3

-M!

I work on this rubik's cube periodically, lose my place, and then start all over again.

yellow gas station

I drove home at 6:40 in the morning after spending the night vomiting purple chunks into A's toilet.
I ended up staying awake, running home to grab my camera, took these photos, and then surprised my girlfriend at her apartment.

I just like this wall.

I bought this Casio several years ago at a flea market for $10. I finally feel like I'm worthy of using it.

These songs are nothing final, nothing finished, but I thought I would track my progress.
I'm teaching myself to play keys with vocals. :-*

Lastly, my lover is the sweetest little biscuit.
She makes me mad. She makes me laugh.
​She brings me flowers.


​-M!

The first shoot of the year!

My mission this year is to help fellow queers and creators.
(I guess it has always been my mission.)
​
BUT this year, I would like to focus on photographing works by fellow queer creators.
SO if you would like to collaborate or have photos taken of yourself, your brands, your creative endeavors, by all means, reach out to me! I am here for you! And I want to help capture your work!

See the full gallery "LOU + YATTA" HERE <3
And if you need more examples of my work, look through the "Gallery" tab for a lonnnnnnggggg list of series. <3

Passing thoughts:
There are days when I wake up, and nothing can satisfy me.
It always passes.
But I used to try to find the things that would satisfy me.
It would always end up with me reaching for people who were no good for me, staying up late, and snorting coke or eating 10 Xanax. Anything for a cheap thrill to help me forget that nothing was good enough.

I don't do that kind of shit anymore.
I just let the boredom pass through me, and maybe take a walk or clean my apartment, or read or go to bed early til it's over.

​I'm not about to go backwards.
​I'm not trying to die early.

I'm just looking for ways to be clean and positive.
On that note, I haven't smoked a cigarette in 11 days, and I've only had a couple drinks since Dec. 31.
And I haven't really eaten cheese, which is really really hard.
This is my second time doing the Whole30, and I really really just want some fucking cheese.
I don't even eat that much cheese to begin with, but someone please feed me pizza on February 1.

Hi!


​-M! <3

This morning I safely drove through an intersection.
Ten minutes later, I drove through the same intersection,
and an SUV had been slammed into on the driver's side door and pushed out of its lane and under a bridge.
The other car, a white truck, was spun around facing the opposite direction, several yards away with its tires burst.

Sometimes I wonder how many times I've avoided death
In days, hours, minutes, seconds- and just by chance.
Just mere weebly wobbly shaky breaky chance.

This is what it looks like when you have an anxiety attack when you're trying to get dressed to celebrate.

First, I put on an outfit that I thought was "good enough" and comfortable.
Then, I went through almost all my clothing, tried everything on twice, put on crotchless pantyhose, took off crotchless pantyhose, tried on different sock combinations, put on six different jackets, almost cried, screamed out loud, searched for a slip, apologized multiple times for being late, said I was leaving, apologized for being late, thought I was dressed too sexy, thought I wasn't dressed sexy enough, still couldn't find slip, dumped out all my under garments on the floor, no slip, changed into and back out of things, started walking out the door, then I screamed more, said sorry for being late- and finally, I put on the first outfit I had on and made my way to S's house an hour late.

I came back home two days later, and this is what it looked like.

In 2008-2009, I was making a bunch of money selling cameras, and I had just moved to Houston, so instead of saving up, I spent almost all my money on movies. I'm keeping all my movies, but I'm getting rid of all cases because they take up too much space. I've replaced all the movie cases with books, got rid of an excess shelf, and I feel much lighter now.